The Crossword Centre Clue-Writing Competition

CCCWC November competition voters’ comments

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A clue to SUBMARINE.
104 comments were received for this competition (from 13 competitors, 1 other)

Here is the text

Comments on the competition
1.
This month's word has attracted a substantial number of entries but seems to have been a difficult one to clue convincingly in all respects: well-disguised definitions and novel anagrams are spoiled by cryptic grammar errors or just implausible surface stories making it difficult (for me) to choose a stand-out winner.
 
Comments on the clues
1. A jolly on returning plane sometimes provides a sandwich
1.I don't understand why jolly = marine, or why plane sometimes = bus.
2. A vehicle's turned over by a soldier operating under the surface
1.Slightly weak (imo) to clue SUBMARINE using MARINE, but a nice surface reading.
4. American sandwich bar's menu is revamped with a bit of imagination
1.Bar menu clue with a nice extra touch
2.So similar to so many other BAR MENU clues.
5. Arnie's bum cracks one that's plausibly deep in sound (9)
1.Made me laugh and a cleverly disguised definition
2.Surface reading is nonsensical.
3.Cheeky but the unusual 'Arnie' rather gives away the anagram fodder and 'bum' is redundant to the colloquial surface story.
6. Bar menu is a mess, but might include this.
1.I would prefer "messy" in place of "a mess".
2."a mess" needs to be "in a mess" or "messy"
8. Biden's accepted Trump essentially ignoring Democratic representation as inferior in the main
1.A nice try but doesn't quite come off.
2.Definition is a stretch
9. Boat. Drive coach back in English
1.Surface reading not very good unless I’m missing something
10. Bum sarnie?
1.I don’t see how a question mark on its own indicates an anagram
2.Nicely succinct.
3.you get a point for cheek (literally)!
4.'?' doesn't indicate an anagram. Could have used 'possibly'?
11. Bus returned with drunken airmen found in boat
1.How does "found in" contribute to the cryptic reading?
2.Straightforward but ticks all the boxes for a good clue.
12. Busier man surfaces victorious
1.We need some indication that "Victorious" is an example of a submarine.
2.Good definition but I don't like 'surfaces' as an anagrind.
13. Correct article misrepresenting Remain constituents in Sandwich ? (9)
1.Nice idea, but the letters of 'remain' are misrepresented, not misrepresenting
14. Craft (remains principally under briny)
1.The anagram indication works only if you consider ‘craft(…)’ as some sort of function.
2.Very neat and clever & lit clue – best of the bunch in my opinion
3.clever double use of 'craft'
4.Where's the anagram indicator?
15. Crazy semiurban or French soldier supplemented with energy first took a bus back to board this?
1.Too complicated for my taste.
16. Cryptically a ‘number’ is something you take to go under
1.Very good. Minor criticism is i’m not entirely convinced by the definition – do you “take” a submarine?
2.liked the surface's allusion to crossword clues!
3.Excellent. Really playing to the crowd with this clue!
4.One may go under anesthesia / an anaesthetic (but not, hopefully, take one to go under)
17. Detailed attack brought back soldiers sheltering in vessel
1.I’m afraid this use of ‘detailed’ is up there with ‘redhead’ as a pet dislike.
2.Liked use of 'sheltering' but surface a bit clunky
18. Dispersed sunbeam initially refracted inside drink?
1.I don't think "drink" is an adequate definition – or are we to allow "inside" to do double duty?
2.Good idea but 'initially' is such a crossword cliche
3...but 'submarine' doesn't mean sea.
4.Drink doesn't mean submarine
19. Distraught man buries poor boy (9)
1.Poor boy was new to me, but makes for a good misleading surface here.
2.Lovely smooth surface
3.Good surface but 'poor boy' too obscure, needs a DBE indicator at least.
4.I liked this – although I've only ever seen them called "po boys". Is the definition a tad too obscure?
5.Good surface, but defining 'submarine' as 'poor boy' is like defining 'robin' as 'chaffinch' (similar but different).
6.Very nice surface
20. Drowned man with bruise that's suspicious
1.I really like this clue but I can’t quite justify ‘suspicious’ as an anagram indicator, so it misses out on top marks.
2.Good surface but not sure if 'drowned' = 'submarine'
3.Sorry, couldn’t fathom the definition
4.Good surface . Not convinced that 'suspicious' indicates an anagram.
21. Exchange blue shade for yellow outfit in tune with green surroundings
1.As with GLORIA last month, it’s asking a bit much of the solver to be familiar with specific song lyrics
2.Too complicated.
22. Fan base in Trump case disappearing – it needs to be watertight
1.Nicely constructed wordplay and def.
23. Fancy bar menu is made for chugging through the drink!
1.Good idea, but most types of boat chug through the drink
2.My favourite of the bar menu clues
3.Nice idea.
24. Fancy bar's menu containing one sandwich
1.So similar to so many other BAR MENU clues.
2.Surface may read better with 'contains', + justified as it refers to a (singular) anagram phrase.
25. Heartless sardine starts to unclothe beautiful mermaid consumed below the waves (9)
1.Lovely image of a beautiful mermaid unclothing (do mermaids wear clothes?) but spoilt by that sardine
27. In Subway menu primarily, what could be a sandwich!
1.I don't think that "X Y Z sandwich" can mean "X Z Y"
2.The Sub in subway and in Submarine share the same root.
3.The wordplay works nicely but not the stated & lit. definition (which would also include 'Subway menu primarily').
28. Is a number scrawled on the bottom?
1.Clever definition
2.Simple and effective.
3.Broad definition but succinct and entertaining clue.
29. King-sized sandwich is ordered with bar menu
1.Don’t you order from a menu rather than with a menu?
2.So similar to so many other BAR MENU clues.
30. Lend cash to sailor for a sandwich
1.I was always taught that splitting a compound word into its components was considered weak clueing.
2.Straightforward and likeable clue.
31. Moves about evenly, remains underwater (9)
1.V good surface and wordplay
2.I quite liked this but would prefer "moving".
3.Positioned as it is, to make sense as an anagrind 'Moves' needs to be 'Move' (imperative)'
32. Mr. Bean is jumping around U-boat (9)
1.Nice to see a clue that's very unique.
2.Although hyphened, U-Boat is one word. The clue would make sense only if there were an U boat.
33. Nimbus are rendering ship unseen
1."Nimbus are" doesn't agree in number. "Nimbi are" or "Nimbus is".
34. "Nurse," I am beginning to blush – "trouble down below" (9)
1.Good surface, but grammatically suspect wordplay
2.Clever and amusing. Personally not keen on this use of trouble as anagrind.
3.A smutty surface reading, so will probably get a lot of votes.
4.Laughed at the surface; 'trouble' (imperative) works as an anagrind; however the surface's punctuation doesn't fit the actual clue.
5.For 'trouble' to work here grammatically as an anagrind, it needs a preposition like 'in'. Such a pity.
35. One having to go under for operation is put out with a 'number'
1.Nicely misleading surface
2.A very nice clue, but edged out by a similar clue
3.Different with well-disguised definition but only in cryptic crosswords does number = anaesthetic.
38. Reactionary bus sabotaging Remain; it plumbs the depths
1.‘Remain’ is sabotaged not sabotaging. Otherwise very good.
2.Excellent clue and I wholeheartedly agree with the surface!
39. Replace fat-free fish with a sandwich (9)
1.It looks more like fish-free fat to me
40. Reversing, I hit people carrier, fine’s half a sandwich
1.Surface ha ha! Wordplay good enough for 1.5 points
2.Lovely surface.
43. Sandwich in bar menu is fantastic
1.Best of the bar menus
2.So many "BAR MENU" clues – this one is OK but unfortunately there were better examples.
44. Sandwich, the centre of unfamiliar urban sprawl in Kent (9)
1.Nice try – almost works – but does Kent = SE ?
46. Semi-urban ground is underwater.
1.Neat – maybe a little too easy?
50. Substitute Little Mermaid’s core number with new arrangement of ‘Under the Sea’
1.Didn't compare well with the simpler "Under the Sea" clue
2.VG – the comprehensive explanation certainly helps one to understand the solidly connected surface without which many might miss it.
51. Tambourines played, but not to Boaty McBoatface?
1.Needs "for example" or similar.
53. Uber's main worry, it's often submerged in conflict.
1.Best of the Uber clues.
54. "Under the Sea" is a number that's lively
1.Smooth surface – my favourite of the under the sea clues
2.Very good.
58. Waves goodbye? Only when she’s low or going to bed
1.I did not understand this clue.
59. When this elasticated top minus bra makes nipples stick out.
1.A smutty surface reading does not a good clue make.
2.An enticing image but I don't know what the nipples are doing. (Apart from sticking out)
3.E would need to be 'elasticated's top'. Nice thought though.
60. Where to find the special feature of a French letter? Sounds like we need a hero
1.Too indirect.
61. With US backing Biden as leader, airmen prepared craft
1.'Biden as leader' is not exactly 'B'. Biden's leader = B.
2."Biden as leader" =/= B
62. Without most of the absinthe and rum mixed in the drink
1.'in the drink' a nice idea but the whole phrase (surface meaning) isn't great. The whole clue does not literally (lit.) define 'submarine'.
2.Nice idea, but not quite executed well enough.