CCCWC May competition voters’ comments
Clue no. 5: Chastity belts stored in attic – a new twist to sex-war drama
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A clue to PHAT (Printer’s Devilry).
4 comments refer to this clue
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| Comments on the competition |
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| 1. |
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c) I think we've demonstrated that good PD clues are not easy to write. Many of these (including mine, I should stress) display one or other of the common weaknesses of the form. These include the use of irrelevant proper names (I exclude "Ralph" on thematic and "why didn't I think of that" grounds) and contorted phraseology that seeks to provide a justification for differing contexts. My own preference is for some new word divisions outside the devilled part. That said, there were several I enjoyed - from the top down
#21 Elegant and clear. The notion of an alpha test for software is new to me, but I assume has technical significance (he said patronisingly!)
#6 The devilry is straightforward, but the clue's attraction lies in the ambiguity of "bowler", which is cleverly exploited.
#4 See above - but the more convoluted surface devalues it by comparison.
#19 More involved devilry, but the change in syntax from "shove" to "shatters" is an unfortunate weakness.
#5 Outrageously imaginative. It's always a shame when the context has to be pointed out, though.
For next month could we have a rhyming couplet including PHAT and with a seasonal theme, just to complete the set? |
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d) When PHAT came up in the previous competition, I thought at the time it might have been better for a PD treatment - if only because it was so difficult to define! It seems that I was not alone - after a pretty iffy entry last month, we have one of the best fields of PD clues I can remember.
Obviously the criteria for judgement are rather different than for a standard clue - reliant on subjective aesthetic appeal instead of soundness. With that in mind, I thought I'd better think about what makes for a good PD clue.
For me, it is absolutely essential that the undevilled version should make some sort of reasonable sense. This is, after all, the only real confirmation (apart from checking letters in a real puzzle) that the solver has of the answer, so it should not be too obscure. If the devilled version can also make good sense in its own right, then you're approaching perfection! Conversely, a smooth devilled version but unconvincing full one is totally unacceptable. A case in point is clue 16 - what exactly does the full version mean?? I'd be very doubtful of having found the right word if that was what I ended up with!
A common mistake is to be too clever - trawling through a dictionary to find words that fit the checking letters, then trying to find any possible break soon becomes a chore rather than the entertaining challenge a crossword should surely be. This seems to be a particular danger in short clues (e.g. clues 9, 21, 22, 28)
That said, there were some real gems this month - certainly had to think long and hard before making my final selection!
5 points - clue 3: Blokes might call - 1:00, Mon / Blokes might call 100 mph a ton
An excellent example of a PD clue where both original and undevilled versions make perfect sense
3.5 points - clue 32: Love poem, Oz art that's typical of the modern generation / Love pop, hate Mozart: that's typical of the modern generation
3.5 points - clue 6: Cheater's promoting a controversial type of bowler / Cheap hatter's promoting a controversial type of bowler
Both these narrowly missed the top spot - for opposite reasons! "Controversial" reads slightly awkwardly in the devilled version of 6, while "Oz" seems somewhat contrived in the full version of 32
2 points - clue 5: Chastity belts stored in attic - a new twist to sex-war drama / Chastity belts stop hatred in Attica - new twist to sex-war drama
1 point - clue 13: How illiberal - error in Printer's Devilry! / Ho! will I be Ralph - a terror in Printer's Devilry? |
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n) I think that, in the absence of the 'control' provided by a definition, the undevilled versions of PD clues need to be as meaningful and syntactically and orthographically straightforward as possible. This is all the truer if the solution is a relatively obscure word, as PHAT is for me. My selections have been made on this basis.
First, for 5 points, clue 31; the undevilled version is an entirely plausible, natural English sentence. Second, for 4 points, clue 9; unflashy, but eminently solvable. Third, for 3 points, clue 21; reasonably plausible, though I find the devilled version equally so. Second, for 2 points, clue 14; quite witty, but the rhetorical question is unfortunate in the undevilled version. Fifth, for 1 point, clue 7, which at least preserves the right balance of plausibility between the two versions. Also worth mentioning: clue 11, which had perhaps the best undevilled version but where I couldn't make any sense of its counterpart; and clue 5, for an allusion to one of the funniest plays ever written. |
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o) Quite a nice lot this month, although there doesn't seem to be a lot to say about them. The clear winner was
1st (3.5 points): 5. Chastity belts stored in attic - a new twist to sex-war drama |
