The Crossword Centre Clue-Writing Competition

CCCWC November competition voters’ comments

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A clue to HUMMINGBIRD.
76 comments were received for this competition (from 7 competitors, 2 others)
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Comments on the competition
1.
This was quite a tough word to clue well. Any reference to a species as a definition needs to make it clear that this is an example, by using "perhaps" or similar wording. Clues which used flier or high-flier alone as a definition scored poorly if at all. Many other clues were let down by poor surface readings. This left only a handful of clues worthy of points and I gave top marks to 27 and 40.
2.
I don’t think this comp word offered enough scope for creative clueing. A lot of variations on the same humming + bird wordplay, and too many flyers. The Birmingham anagram was the best idea, followed by some of the hermits, but I awarded points a bit reluctantly.
3.
Far too many clues defining by example without indicating that they are doing so.
Also a few unsound ones, the sort of indirect clue that I believe Ximenes or Azed called "a clue to a clue."
4.
Others will probably disagree, but I'm afraid I thought that the use as definitions of the names of various species of hummingbird (Hermit, Jacobin, Inca, etc) required ornithological knowledge that would be unreasonable and unfair to expect in a non-specialist puzzle – I imagine that most of the setters had recourse to Wikipedia etc – while the ubiquitous "flier"/"flyer" was just too humdrum and obvious to merit points, unless part of an otherwise brilliant clue. This left remarkably few clues in the running, of which, for me, 10 was head and shoulders above the rest.
5.
I struggled to find clues worth awarding points to. Many of them define the answer with an example (hermit, coquette, etc) without any indication of definition by example. I discounted all these. Predictably, many broke 'humming-bird' into its two components, which is not the best cluing practice unless the result is a stunner. None of the examples here are, but some are perfectly sound, and one shows wit and ingenuity in the definition 21. Because it also has a natural surface I ended up placing it at the top of my selection. An anagram possibly offered the best scope, though one that had the potential to be a very good clue is faulty 25. I thought 1 and 10 were the best of the anagram clues, coincidentally both based on BIRMINGHAM. Some clues contained obscure references that might escape many solvers. A clue that needs the compiler to explain obscure references is not a good clue in my opinion, especially for a clue competition – e.g 7, 12.
 
Comments on the clues
1. A flier — Birmingham Airport's first going off, due shortly to fly
1.Good idea. Weakened slightly by the use of "fly" twice.
2.The deletion of A results in some rather stilted cryptic syntax, but this is one of the better clues avoiding the obvious HUMMING + BIRD
2. American flier buzzing at four o'clock
1.'Four o'clock' to indicate BIRD is definition by example, with no indication as such
3. Anna's a high-flier
1.A definition that doesn't appear in Chambers or Collins seems unfair
2.I liked the simplicity of this clue
3.Incomplete definition by example, with no indication as such
4. Around 2001, suspended prison sentence for flyer
1.'Suspended prison sentence' for HUNG BIRD is neat. A modified definition might have been possible to suit the surface image better
5. Ava is a girl who doesn't know the words to a song. (11)
1.A definition that doesn't appear in Chambers or Collins seems unfair
2.Definition by example, with no indication as such
6. Avian singing bride distraught after losing voice in the end (11)
1.'Avian singing bride' doesn't mean a lot
7. Bring him Mud to remake into a cake
1.This doesn’t really hang together cryptically, and the bakery chain is unfamiliar.
2.While the anagram works, the surface sense and the definition depend on obscurities that few would get without the writer's explanation.
8. Colourful flyer, based on very little of substance, raised twice the stink
1.What is the function of 'the'? It's a struggle to see the correct order of elements
9. Coquette possibly coming up to tease after smelling blood at last
1.Coquette was a nice find & this clue weaves it into a consistent picture for the surface while correctly indicating definition by example.
2.Indication of D cold be better, but otherwise a sound clue.
10. Diminutive winger departs after Birmingham settled with United for ace
1.A little clunky but gets points for imagination in both definition and wordplay.
2.Nice use of the Birmingham anagram
3.Nice definition though the last part of the clue weakens the surface a bit
11. Droning on a little about frilled coquette, perhaps
1."Droning" is too close a definition to the use of "humming" in the word itself
2.'Frilled' in the sense of 'ruffled' is indicated as archaic in Chambers, so really should have some qualification
12. Drunken bearded mountaineer, initially hiding rum for himself?
1.Nice idea, but it depends on an example of a humming-bird that is not in the main dictionaries
13. Dynasty taken over by awfully dumb heir loses state ultimately to a Hermit, say (11)
1.'Taken over' doesn't work as a container, and 'to' is a weak link. I don't see the point of an upper-case H for 'hermit'.
14. Flier for Sound of Music?
1.Seems to be missing a definition.
2.Not sure how this is supposed to work. Some sort of cryptic definition? If not, 'for' is wrong as a link.
15. Flier's busy attempt to catch rat's head (11)
1.very good surface meaning in this clue
2.The surface would have been better with a different indication of R
16. Frequent flyer is kind of dumb! Ring him!
1.I don’t think ‘kind of’ indicates an anagram in the way that ‘sort of’ does.
2.'Kind of' doesn't really work as an anagram indicator. 'Sort of' might do. The surface isn't all that good.
17. Having hovered around, I'm back to sip a taste of mellifluousness…back for a tiny amount
1.Quite a feat to come up with an &lit clue to this!
2.The last five words are superfluous to the definition, so not &lit. 'Back for X' does not indicate the reversal of 'X'.
18. Hermit perhaps killed time in cell around 2001
1.Surface reading doesn't quite have it ("2001" a bit weak) buy I liked "killed time in cell" = "hung bird"
2.The clue is sound though the arbitrary '2001' isn't great for the surface.
19. Hermit, perhaps, that flies rapidly from Spooner's begging rabble.
1.I wondered if anyone would dare take on the spoonerism – and thankfully, done in perfectly good taste!
2.The best of the 'Spooner' clues, though I wonder if 'coquette' wouldn't have suited the surface better.
20. Hi mum. Bring a penny to design this flyer.
1.'To design' is transitive, so it doesn't work as an anagram indicator (unlike 'change' for example). Not a great surface.
21. High time for in-flight refuelling expert (11)
1.Original definition and I like "high time" for the word play
2.Deserves recognition for an imaginative cryptic definition, though it's a bit liberal so a question mark would be better.
22. High time to become a hermit?
1.Small but perfectly formed!
2.Concise.
24. Hmm, during short bit working one is seen buzzing around
1.Sound clue but 'Hmm' is a bit contrived.
25. Humid days bring out tiny hovering creature
1.Original idea, but a faulty anagram. Humid months (m) would have worked.
2.The anag fodder is incorrect. Missing an M, extra D
3.Unfortunately, HUMIDDBRING* gives HUMDINGBIRD, not HUMMINGBIRD, while D = day, not days.
4.Good surface meaning; clever anagram
5.Would have been nice if it worked. The anagram omits an M and has too many D's.
27. In swift order flyer appeared – high time too (11)
1.Past tense, 'appeared' is inappropriate to describe the structure of the word
28. Inca beating big drum starts to make noise inside harem (7,4)
1.A definition that doesn't appear in Chambers or Collins seems unfair
2.Definition by example, with no indication as such. Image of an Inca inside a harem is a bit odd
29. Jacobin's prison sentence received after agitating
1.Definition by example, with no indication as such. I don't regard 'agitating' as a close synonym of 'humming'.
30. Nectar drinker's busy knocking back a wee dram?
1.Intransitive present participle after 'busy' isn't right for reversal. 'Drib' isn't Scottish, but 'wee dram' is still valid for the clue
31. Nectarivore, hoverer and can also fly backwards
1.Hardly cryptic.
2.This isn’t really a cryptic clue, more a general knowledge one.
3.This is not a triple definition as normally understood, i.e. 3 different meanings. It's one definition indicated in three different ways.
32. One hovering in prison after fixing husband for good
1.Nice surface, but do you hover in prison?
2."One hovering" is perhaps a slightly weak definition, but I like the wordplay and consistent surface
3.Cryptic structure is weakened by the lack of any punctuation after 'fixing', but quite a nice surface
33. Petite exotic beauty – but even her best friends daren't tell her "B..O.."!
1.The secondary indication is entirely inadequate. "- but even her best friends daren't tell her" contributes nothing to the wordplay.
34. Raising a stink next to cell one has two wings abuzz.
1.cell = prison, prison = bird, but that doesn’t justify cell = bird
2.'Bird' is prison or a prison sentence, but neither Chambers nor Oxford defines it as a cell.
35. Small flier might be regularly drumming mysteriously
1.A different anagram indicator could have improved the surface.
36. Small flyer is dry: bring him mud! (11)
1.Dry as anagram indicator; how does that work?
2.Unnatural surface, and 'dry' is a poor anagram indicator.
37. Smell space villain – that's a stretch for American flyer
1.Unnatural surface
38. Spooner's begging picked up a bright little chick.
1.A clue to a clue – i.e. unsound
2.A chick is the young of a fowl. I don't see it's apt for a humming-bird.
39. Spoooner's scrounging scrum is a hoverer
1.A clue to a clue – i.e. unsound
2.This made me smile – points for originality
3.The surface doesn't mean a lot, and 'Spooner' is misspelled
40. Was really active doing jail time, busy on the wing, we hear?
1.'Was' is superfluous and it's hard to see what is the definition
41. White-bearded hermit drumming and hibernating a bit erratically
1.On what basis does 'a bit' indicate selection of first 3 letters of Hibernating?
2.Definition by example, with no indication as such; 'hibernating a bit' is unsatisfactory for HIB.